The Dragon Lady
Vacay update: it's been busy. Lots to do with the holidays. Places to go, people to see, and people keep popping up on my ever-growing Christmas List! "Oh, and I need to get something for insert name here."
So this is Christmas prep week: shopping, wrapping, mailing, giving, parties, gigs, and so on and so on and so on....
Next week, although it is Christmas week, it will also be Geek Week! I'm excited just writing that! I've got to get my Christmas-cookied-ass back in the study saddle again.
Right before going on vacation, everyone asked me what I was going to do and where I was going to go. When I told them I was staying home and I was going to be studying, they pretty much felt bad for me. I could tell. Some didn't know what to say and some made a sad face.
But here's the thing: I'm a geek. Now I could do without the grades, papers, and exams, but the journey there is a passion! I love learning and studying! It gets me going!
Recently, someone said to me, "Well, you're an overachiever!"
Whoa!!!!!! Now if I hadn't kept my cool, he would've gone up in flames from my dragon-lady-fire-breath-wrath! As soon as he said that to me, my body flooded with, "NO. I AM NOT!" I sat up straight in my chair and energetically got into my war stance. Bring...It...On...
Now I was a little shocked by how strongly I was offended. The comment came from a white male and I felt "Asian-ed." I mean, I am, but I felt so stereotyped - the good asian girl getting top grades to please the family...blah, blah and BLAH!
Okay, so yes, that USED to be me. I was that and he obviously pushed a button. But from those old days, I've changed! The little caterpillar left her books behind, moved to California and became a singing butterfly! Woo Hoo!
However, sitting in my study at 5:30 am , completely enveloped in my books for my doctoral program in Holistic Health, I realized that although I threw my family-pleasing, J.D.-pursuing self out the window, the part of me that is passionate about learning is a real and true part of who I am and I like that. This time I'm doing it for me.
So instead of going to battle with The White Male, I simply said, "No, I'm not an overachiever. I'm passionate. I just know what I love and I'm doing it."
So there! RAAWWWRRRRRRRR!!!!!!