78 Let's Talk About Sex
NOTE: we designated this an “EXPLICIT” EPISODE in Apple Podcasts because we address sex in it.
After some chit chat at the beginning about flavored coffee, Asian grocery stores, sushi, and the music that airlines play when landing in Hawaii airports, we get into the topic of sex at about 10:00 into the podcast.
To clarify, we’re talking about it in the context of a committed, monogamous relationship that prioritizes spiritual growth.
Why Only Talk About Sex Now, 13 years after starting the podcast?
We first address why we decided to NOT talk about sex on the podcast (until now) since first starting it in 2007. That’s when George W. Bush was still President of the United States!
George W. Bush, 43rd President of the United States (Presidential term: 1/20/01 - 1/20/09)
Answer: it has to do with establishing the full humanity of LGBTQ people in the mind of society at large. Every one of us is so much more than a sex act. That’s self-evident and obvious to us. We’re grateful that since 2007, we’ve seen the public at large come to realize this more and more. Free your mind, people!
Lesbian Bed Death
(Now how funny is that, to have “Lesbian Bed Death” be so close to a picture of George W. Bush. hah!) LBD. Not Little Black Dress, although it does mean that, too, and Siena is a big believer. But here, we’re talking about Lesbian Bed Death.
Our casual theory is that it’s affected by…
the length of your relationship
changes in hormones as you both grow and mature
adult responsibilities and stresses (work, family, children)
So what to do about it, if you want to do something about it?
Well…
Schedule Sex
We talk about scheduling sex (just making yourselves do it), and our experience with doing that.
But we also talk about how we’ve found it helpful to…
Focus on Connection
Focusing on improving communication (and not just talking; that’s just one of the love languages) and connection has been super helpful, too, and that’s where knowing about The 5 Love Languages comes in.
We also discuss our theory about how LBD might be a thing, because in relationships between two women, the nurturing aspects of feminine energy can perhaps more easily foster or replace the physical intimacy of sex.
Sex and The Second Chakra
After a quick nod to the U-Haul joke (OG lesbians know what we’re talking about here), we move on to talking about sex in the context of the second chakra.
Sex is so much more than a one-dimensional act that’s limited to physicality. It’s an energetic phenomena.
The second chakra is an energy center that has to do with creativity, work, career, calling, relationships (and not just with your partner), and money.
We hope this episode conveys a sense of validation, understanding, and encouragement to those in the LGBTQ community, especially those who identify as lesbian, in regards to sex in a committed monogamous relationship.